Sometimes handwritten thank you notes help you get your biggest dream. Try it for 10 days.

I was grumpy! I had been passed over on several jobs that “should have been” mine. My teens were texting instead of talking. My husband’s head was in his work. My father was dying. Nothing too out of the ordinary for a middle aged woman.

I also just had eye surgery so I had to keep my screen time to a minimum.

What was a grumpy writer to do? I remembered as a kid I used to love writing letters. I had pen pals . The thrill of seeing a letter in my post box is one of my fondest memories. I still do this every month with Write More Love Letters. A non profit delivering hand written notes to folks in need.

I also always practiced gratitude. In fact, at family dinners, every night each member of our family goes around and says what they are grateful for. It immediately changes our mood right before we eat together.

So I decided to write a thank you note every day for ten days. I thought this letter writing might get me out of my bad mood. Even before putting pen to paper, just thinking about these people made me feel better.

So I wrote my ten notes. Some notes, I dropped off. Some I mailed. All were handwritten. And each letter gave me something I could never imagine. More on that later.

1. I wrote the owner of my local coffee house. I thanked him for staying open during Covid, providing us with creative concoctions rather than the standard formulaic high sugar coffee drinks of the massive chains. He framed my card. When I saw it on the wall, I introduced myself and my young daughter who commented on the wall art. The owner asked my daughter “are you an artist?” My daughter nodded. “Well, perhaps we should have a youth art show?” We did three months later. My daughter’s 6th grade portraits hung on his walls as the community surrounded young painters.
2. I wrote the post man. I thanked him for always delivering my mail. For doing a thankless job that kept my catologues coming.
3. I wrote my the woman who cut my hair. I’ve been going to my hairstylist for a year. Always tippped her genoursly but I never really told her how happy I was everyday when I looked in the mirror. I sent her a post card from Em&Friends that said “You are doing a freaking great job!” Three sentences about how much I loved my hair. The next time I went in, she, too had it taped on her mirror. “This made my year!” She proclaimed. “As a single mother standing on her feet all day, it means so very much!”
4. I wrote a friend who I had let slip away. I wrote how much I appreciated her for the time in my life when we were close. I didn’t do it with any expectation. But I wanted her to know that her friendship had been significant ! She texted me and we had a long over due lunch.
5. I wrote the owner of local second hand clothing shop. Jessica, the owner of shop called “Sisterwife” bought and sold beautiful second hand clothes. I shopped there regularly picking up dresses that were beautiful. They also were in allinement with my activism in fighting against climate change. I loved her store for it’s mission.
6. I wrote the librarians at my library. Those women and men who help you find the book you need. Libraries are the last great hope for democracy. When my newphew was diagnosed with cancer, I needed to find books on testucular cancer, one librrian sat with me for an hour as we combined though research.
7. I wrote my city Mayor. We have a bold female mayor where I live. Most people in the city either deafify the mayor or demaonize the mayor. Very few thank her for her service. I did.
8. I wrote my husband a thank you letter. I do thank him regularly. But one day I sat down and really noticed all the selfless acts he does around the house. He is solely responsible for our dog. I never clean up my dog’s mess. And I realized I had never specifically thanked him for that.
9. I wrote my old Professor. Everyone has at least one teacher who rocked their world. Mine was my Creative Writing Professor. The first person who believed in me when I said. “I’m a writer!” I told her how much she had taught me. How much my work as a writer and filmmaker were because of her.
10. I wrote my nieghbors. I live on a very small street with good people. Yes, we are all distracted with work and duties. We nod and smile. I wrote them tiny postcards. Something small I appreciated about each one of them. Their lawn, their food. Their smile. Suddenly, I had many more conversations with each of them.

After the ten days were over, I noticed that something had lifted in me, I could notice that these little appreications were actually big things in my life. I failed to recongize this before.

I also stopped waiting for that job I wanted and started creating a new project for myself. Directing my second film.

And here is how the thank you notes aided me in my journey.

As I said, I didn’t start out with any idea that small thank you and gratitude would bring anything back to me. I did it to elevate my mood and notice all the tiny sweet things in my life. Yet, the fact that all these appreciations aided me in one of my biggest dreams, cannot be ignored.

So here is what I got back.

1. The local owner of the coffee house let me shoot my film in his business. And provided coffee.
2. When I was realized that I was late in mailing a grant application by one day, I chased down the postman who I knew by name. He took my package and got my film application in ontime.
3. The woman who cut my hair donated a day to do makeup and hair for my actors.
4. The friend who slipped away now worked in Public Relations. She agreed to do the publicty for my film.
5. The second hand clothing store offered costumes.
6. The librarians provided me tons of books and leads on how to accomplish this goal.
7. Since I shot the film in my hometown. I needed city permits. The mayor agreed to help.
8. My husband. He took over child care.
9. My old college professor held a screening of the film in her class.
10. My neighbors were patient when big trucks parked on our street.

All of these new connections were from simply saying thank you to people who surround me. I got to love them and thank them.

I got a community.